The Old Hickory Cocktail

I wish I could truthfully tell you, Thirsty Readers, that The Old Hickory Cocktail was good to the last drop (phrase courtesy of  Maxwell House), but alas, I cannot. I can't even say with experience that it was good until the fourth drop, because I confess that I poured the drink down the drain after three valiant sips.  I'm sorry, Old Hickory. I guess I just don't like vermouth. Or maybe I have crappy vermouths in my inventory. Since the possibly crappy vermouths are all I have in the house, I can't very well tell if it is the former or the latter that is the problem with this Godawful drink. Tomorrow, when I am out with my friend Lauren, I shall consult a knowledgable bartender about it. Until then, I can only assume. And you know what happens when we assume.

It's a shame about the cocktail, though, because I could have used a good one tonight, after spending what seemed like an eternity sitting through the movie of a book that should never have been made into a movie.  It was, except for the two far too brief scenes with Willem Defoe, a completely tedious story with no dramatic tension or arc. Yes, I'm embarrassed to say I went to see The Fault in Our Stars. There.  Now you know.  It's not the type of movie I would generally see, but I was dragged. Enough. Of. That. (And poor, poor Laura Dern. The material she was given to work with was DREADFUL.)

So, back to the Old Hickory Cocktail. I'm going to share with you the customary photo of the beverage along with the recipe, but unless you love vermouth, don't make this drink. It's a waste of perfectly good ice and bitters.  My apologies to my Bitters hero, BT Parsons. This recipe is from the otherwise (so far) right on the money collection of cocktail recipes in his brilliant book, Bitters.  Have I mentioned a hundred times how much I like this book? 

I bet ground-up pages of this book taste better than The Old Hickory.

The Old Hickory Cocktail

1 1/2 ounces dry vermouth 

1 1/2 ounces sweet vermouth

1 dash orange bitters

1 dash Peychaud's Bitters

Garnish: Lemon Twist (I used Grapefruit. Hey, it's all I had.)

Pour all the ingredients except the garnish into an old-fashioned glass filled. Stir and garnish. Pour down the drain.  I mean, enjoy.

Cheers!